I've been looking back on past relationships (and almost-relationships) a lot lately. (I blame that stupid On This Day thing on Facebook! Lol.) And I've noticed that I was an annoying piece of shit most of the time.
My On This Days are filled with rants and depressing realisations and on the days when I actually have something good to say about the guys that I was dating, I usually withheld the bad stuff - and there was a lot of that… the bad stuff.
grey Top Gun top from Romwe / grey jogger pants from RRJ / yellow socks from Proppy Socks / triple black Airmax sneakers from Nike
Based on my On This Days, I was a very unhappy person. And if you've known me for the past five years, you'll know how much shit I've gone through in terms of
men guys cheaters and I've done nothing but whine and complain about my so-called "love life". Well, things have finally changed for the better (and I actually mean it this time :p).
It may be a bit early to be talking about 'forever', but I have finally found someone I can truly be my true self with. It isn't until I met Julian that I realised that I had been settling for less than I wanted all this time.
Yes, I dated some great guys along the way and I really liked all of them at the time, but there was always something that I simply settled for because I believed that nobody could be perfect. Since I believed that there was no such thing as perfect, I lowered my personal standards and tried to make things work. They never did.
I know this sounds like such codswallop (I personally never believed my friends whenever they told me this, either), but there is such a thing as a perfect someone out there for you. They may not be a perfect person, in general, but they will be perfect for you.
According to On This Day, I was at a bookstore with a guy two years ago and I squealed when I saw a book I had been looking for. The guy I was with at the time told me to please keep it down and asked me to keep my weirdness at bay because we were in public.
These days, whenever I squeal - no matter how stupid the reason - Julian just laughs and tells me he loves me. He also speaks English well, so we communicate well (I never have to cringe inside because of poor grammar or anything!) and he supports my job, crazy schedule and last-minute cancellations like no other.
Obviously, everyone has their own set of standards and what they deem important in my life. For me, that's language, weirdness, geekiness, work and Syrena - and I am so god darned lucky to have finally found someone who accepts everything about me and understands my priorities in life.
So, if you're recently heartbroken or are currently re-considering your decisions of the heart, remember that you should never settle. No matter what. There is someone perfect for you out there. Believe. :)